Saturday, April 15, 2017

Jobs for Juveniles

I've noticed a lack in work among kids under 16. The excuse is always "I'm not old enough to get a job," and "recent developments in the juvenile mental studies department have concluded that children younger than 16 should pursue a different activity, as jobs can cause an increase in depression, stress, and loss of years."
We all know that's bologna, and that's not true at all. I've devised a list for the younger generation to get some spending currency.

Mowing Lawns - It's easy! Just have your parents teach you how, and once you have that, you're set. Go door to door offering your service!

Lemonade Stands - This one's easy. Just pull out that old table from the garage, a pitcher filled with water, and throw lemonade mix into it. Then wait for the money to start rolling in.

Yard Work - Scary, huh? Find the right employer, and you can get yourself some good money for doing odd jobs around the yard. Pulling weeds, planting flowers, hunting wolves. All that fun stuff, and more!

Yard Sale - This one's a bit tricky. You've got to find all the stuff you don't want, and lay it out in the open with a price tag. You can sell just about anything, and it's definitely a good once a year thing to do.

Babysitting - Oh, babysitting. It's dreaded by both the sitter and the sat. It's really easy, and you can often make a pretty good increase from it. Just make sure she doesn't eat that chalk. Oh, look! They're fighting again!

Dress Up as Ringo Star From The Beatles and Lip Sync at Bachelorette Parties - It's pretty hard to pull off, but did you know you can actually impersonate the Beatles? It's quite the task, but I know from experience that it can be done. I play a mean Ringo Star, so call me if you need a drummer.

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